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[The Gopher]

I'm the worst at math. I can't even do simple subtraction without counting backwards on my fingers. God forbid the number be bigger than 10.

I'm scared that I'm growing apart from people I care about. There's like three or four people that I use to be so close with, and now I've seemingly replaced them with other people I really care about. I want to be able to have time for everyone, but maintaining that many close relationships is very draining on me in terms of emotional energy and physical energy. I just hate the thought of their lives going on without me. 

[The Headliner]

I just hate the thought of their lives going on without me. 

*dials 911*

[Ethan]

I love you Gopher, but wow that was some straight emo shit there. Good grief um well try harder to connect with them?

[The Gopher]

Emo Gopher could work, Ethan. I have been needing a gimmick change for a while now, as 'Evil Administrator' isn't helping me get over... 

[The Headliner]

You were never going to be able to out-'bad cop' me.

[The Headliner]

I've had an email from WX's webhosts titled "Disk Usage Warning warn" - which can only mean one thing.

Someone's in need of a proofreader.

GrammarMan to the rescue!

[El Jackal]

Heady's new haircut 

[The Headliner]

[The Headliner]

Wondering what the black shape that keeps following me round on Google Street View is, and then realizing it's the camera's own shadow...

[The Headliner]

That sudden sense of dread after you let go of the envelope in a mailbox, the point of no return. "I did put a stamp on it, didn't I?"

[Matches Malone]

That poor dear might get hit by the train.